The first thing I saw, when I came round from my recent major heart surgery, was Julia’s lovely face grinning at me through a forest of arms, legs, tubes, drains and so on! I would like to tell you that my first words on waking up were a heroic statement of faith and confidence, such as ‘Why were you all so worried? I told you that I would come through it all without any problem or pain!’ The reality, however was that I apparently muttered a rather feeble, ‘I’m feeling a bit uncomfortable?’ The truth of the matter was that I actually felt, as the French somewhat indelicately put it, like merde!
I felt as though a herd of elephants had trampled all over my chest – which was not too far off the mark – since they had opened my chest, deliberately broken the…
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