I was giggling so hard, I thought I was going to pee myself. “Oh, we got the Ladies, if you sit on a boy’s lap, you should sit on a phone book speech from Sister Mary Claire. She wouldn’t ever tell us why, though. I don’t think she really knew herself, it was just the speech she was supposed to deliver.”
“Why a phone book?”
I’d left both the men puzzling over that one for a moment.
“Because,” I winked wickedly at Duncan, “if he gets a woody you won’t feel it.”
“My God, Rose, I don’t believe you said that.”
Duncan and Bill were laughing so hard they had tears in their eyes.
“She’s an expert on phone books now, is she?” Bill’s eyes were twinkling.
“Either that or she’s an expert on woodies, Bill. Which do you think?”
“Oh, you’re evil.” I smacked him playfully on the arm.
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Viv Drewa - The Owl Lady 